Welcome to all of my Moms who have T1D kids!
Today’s question is: How uncomfortable are you willing to be to achieve your dreams?
We all experience pain throughout our life. As a mom of a T1D son, I always believed that my pain experience was justified. My thought, “It’s not fair that my son has diabetes” triggered my pain and it felt excruciating. I avoided, resisted and reacted to that triggered pain. Today’s blog is about how I learned to process that pain (feel the pain on purpose.) Feeling pain on purpose, surely doesn’t sound fun…it wasn’t but it was so worth it!!!
I asked you in my last blog post, Punched in the Face, to just notice your painful trigger. What thought about diabetes triggers your pain? I went over the four options of processing pain. Three options keep you from addressing the cause of the pain: avoidance, resisting, and reacting.
The fourth option is processing pain. It is a way that you can choose to feel the pain on purpose. Experiencing fear, worry, anger on purpose makes our life bigger and allows us to grow.
To be human means that you have a primitive brain/tendency to feel safe and comfortable (back in the cave) and not feel threatened by anything that is outside of your comfort zone. Learning to process pain causes discomfort! Discomfort is the currency to your dreams, therefore learning to process pain is essential to your personal growth.
My thought, “It’s not fair that my son has diabetes” triggered my pain and it felt excruciating. That feeling actually caused physical discomfort. I avoided, resisted and reacted to that triggered pain. Eventually I felt that pain and decided to stop hiding out from my own life. Stop avoiding taking action even though it hurt.
It’s the hard part because you believe it is the absolute truth. It’s just unfair! Just Notice It!
Every time I thought it was unfair I would get angry. My son didn’t deserve diabetes. My son was too young for diabetes. My son deserves a better life! After years of staying in the “pain cave” I decided to notice my brain. Notice what thought was programmed in and I…
Didn’t avoid it, didn’t resist it, didn’t react to it…I just said to my primitive brain, “This is pain, this is difficult, I can do difficult things.”
This is the part of the journey that hurts. The part that feels heavy, that takes your breath away! It’s the hard part because you believe it is an absolute truth. It’s just unfair! The thought triggers pain and this emotional pain can ravage your body. The feelings (vibrations in your body) caused by the thought are excruciating. Once you are able to just notice your brain and it’s default thoughts…new thoughts will begin to appear. Practice those new thoughts, write them down, see if they serve you. The thought like, “I deserve better” might seem great but it’s not empowering. I deserve better can instill a thought that you can’t feel better until your life is free of diabetes. Not the best new thought to practice. Allow yourself to be overwhelmed, confused, and for the hurt to come.
Own your pain! It’s yours! Give yourself permission! It may take a few minutes, a few hours, a few days, or a few weeks to embrace new thoughts and for the pain to subside…but it will.
Ask yourself these questions:
- How can I use this pain?
- How is this perfect?
- What can I do that comes from peace, is for me, and is not trying to change anything?
- How can I accept this with grace?
Want to learn how to own your painful thought about diabetes? Join me in a FREE 20 minute Exploration Coaching Session! It’s confidential one-on-one coaching. Click here to sign up for a free session…and tune in for my next blog, Releasing the PAIN (Part 3.)