Welcome to all of my Moms who have T1D kids!
Today’s question is:Is the fear you are feeling about diabetes useful?
Having a child diagnosed with diabetes is scary. No doubt! It seems like a fact. Diabetes is scary!
If you’ve been reading my blogs and understand the concept of The Model (if you’d like more info go back and review the blog) you know that facts are neutral. Diabetes being scary is just your thought about it. It may seem true because it’s the sentence you continue to tell your brain over and over again.
Is your predominate sentence you are repeating to yourself about diabetes serving you? Is it useful?
I began to question my own thoughts, years into the diagnosis, because I wanted better results from my life. I was living in constant fear. I wanted my son to not be subjected to my negative thoughts about diabetes and to be afraid all the time. I realized that diabetes can have moments in which fear serves me: to call campus security, to wake his roommate to check on him (I’m sure you have your own list.) However, most of the time the fear does not serve me.
Most of the time, fear is not there to save his life or protect him from imminent danger. Most days, fear needs a gentle reminder to move along.
You can allow fear to stop you in your tracks every day; before every finger prick, when they say they’re hunger, after every phone call they don’t pick up or you can unleash your intentional brain power and logically think about what thought will serve you to get a better result in that particular moment.
The thing to realize is that your brain is super-programmed for fear and survival, but since your primitive brain has evolved, a lot of your fear is irrational and even unnecessary.
It’s helpful to recognize that fear that serves you and irrational fear are going to be part of your life, especially with a T1D child. This thought will help you moving forward. Also, fear does not have to mean stop. You don’t have to be fearless to take action. Really consider this.
Taking action, while acknowledging fear, can be one of the most powerful things you can do.
Most of the fear that you have comes from a thought in your mind, a thought that is irrational. Let that sink in. I had thousands of moments that I would be in the kitchen cooking dinner and realized I hadn’t seen him run through for a little while and immediately my brain went to…he must be seizing in his room. This fear sent me to screaming his name repeatedly until I heard his voice. Yes…he did seize in his room once but it was after playing football (and skipping lunch.) Ever since that moment my default brain went to that same place – he must be seizing.
Do you have a thought pattern like that? I had a six lane highway in my brain that went right there. Right to panic mode.
It wasn’t healthy nor was it good for him to hear fear in my voice over and over again. Guess what? The best news is that you and I have control over that thought process. You can overcome that fear, like I did, by deciding not to believe that thought causing it. Instead, you can understand it, find its cause, find the thought pattern that is causing the thought, and then change it.
If the fear is deep-seated (like mine) and hard to change, I want you to do the work to change it. I want you to know it will be uncomfortable, but worth it.
What are you afraid of? I know I had a whole list that I was afraid of…most of them were irrational. The ones that were rational…the fear stopped me from taking action…at least calm purposeful action. Taking action while feeling the fear is a skill you can develop!
Finding composure in the panic, is the moment you evolve to the next version of yourself.
Knowing that your feelings are completely within your control creates power in your life…power over diabetes.
Would you like help conquering the fear you have of diabetes? Would you like help finding composure in the panic? Join me in a FREE 20 minute Exploration Coaching Session! It’s confidential one-on-one coaching. Click here to sign up for a free session.